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Friday, April 29, 2011

The weekly quote-shoot [chapter 2]


A lot of things, both bad and worse, happened over the past seven days, both in my life and in the newspapers! I'll talk about my own in some other post, but right now its the time for my weekly shooting spree. Here we go...
i)M.K Kanimozhi, daughter of M.Karunanidhi and co-accused in the 2G-scam
What she said: “I will not disclose my income tax info under RTI”
What she didn't say: “Who said I don't want to disclose it? I spoke to the Income Tax sleuths yesterday. They said they're having problems printing my bank account details. Albeit for some weird reason, everytime they query for my account balance, their database crashes printing some error messages like 'retrieved figure out of Integer's range' and stuff”.



ii)Vyalar Ravi, MoS, Civil Aviation
What he said: “The (agititating Air India) pilots, aren't even graduates. Their starting salary is Rs. 3.6 lacs per months. Other Indians earn less that Rs. 50 per month”
What he didn't say: “Thank God! Traveling cattle class in in Air India was never my cup of tea. Lets hope I get to fly on Jet, at least till these chaps carry on with their stuff”.



iii) Emma Watson
What she said: “Bullying wasn't the reason for me leaving the Brown University”
What she didn't say: “I guess the guys at the new university will not shout '50 points for Gryffindor' everytime I raise my hand in the class”



iv) Sunil Gavaskar, giving his reasons why Jimmy Amarnath should have been made the coach of the Indian team instead of Duncan Fletcher
What he said: “The core of the Indian team today is from the Hindi-speaking belt”
What he didn't say: “All our best coaches have come from Hindi-speaking belts. John Wright comes from Wellington, which has two North-Indian dhabas and Gary came from Cape Town, where my favorite show Khatron Ke Khiladi was shot last year. Traditional Hindi-speaking belts, you see!”



v)Timothy Roemer, US ambassador to India, after US firms Boeing and Lockheed Martin lost out to European Rafale and Eurofighter aircrafts in the race for IAF's multi million dollar aircaft deal
What he said: “I've decided to quit. I was told that the procedure(for the deal) would be fair. But it wasn't”
What he didn't say: “Well what do you do after you F-16 shoots down thirteen Rafales and seventeen Eurofighter Typhoons during one sortie? Ha ha!!! Gotha! You just turn off your play station an go to sleep”.



vi) Jose Mourinho, Real Madrid's head coach, after his side lost to Barcelona in the first leg of their UEFA champion's league semi-final clash
What he said: “I respect Pep Guardiola(Barcelona's coach) a great deal as a person and as a coach. But i'd like to see him win the Champion's league without sandles for once”
What he didn't: Bloody hell! I'll have to stick to euphemism as long as the (Messi)ah is still playing for his side.



vii)Anonymous, Ashmit Patel's friend on Ashmit's relationship with Veena Malik
What he said: “It was a one way affair from Veena's side. She loved him, he didnt”
What he didn't: “I've heard that this time around only married couples would be allowed inside Big Boss. To prevent the torture of these scoundrels marrying each other and the torture of having to see them on the TV again, I had to spread this rumor”.



viii)Kiran Reddy, CM Andhra Pradesh
What he said: “The Andhra government will not take over Sri Sathya Sai Trust after his holiness' demise”.
What he didn't: “We're looking for more lucrative areas to take over. Only yesterday I heard the news that A Raja and Kanimozhi run an IT company out of Hyderabad.

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